Thursday, July 19, 2007

Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity.
Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run, crashing the system whenever selected. I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications.
I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0. Please help!
Thanks,
A Troubled User (KEEP READING)

Two Asian Men

A bus stops and two Asian men get on. They seat themselves, and engage in animated conversation.
The lady sitting behind them ignores their conversation at first,
but she listens in horror as one of the men says the following:"Emma (M) come first. Den I(i) come. Two asses(s), dey(they) come together. I(i) come again. Two asses(s), dey(they) come together again. I(i) come again and pee(p) twice. Then I(i) come once-a more.""You foul-mouthed swine," retorted the lady indignantly. "In this country we don't talk about our sex lives in public!"
"Hey, cool down lady," said the man. "I'm just telling my friend how to spell Mississippi."

An English girl?!

A woman goes to England to attend a 2-week, company training session.
Her husband drives her to the airport and wishes her to have a good trip.
The wife answers: Thank you honey, what would you like me to bring for you?
The husband laughs and says: An English girl !!!
The woman kept quiet and left.
Two weeks later he picks her up in the airport and asks:So, honey, how was the trip?
Very good, thank you.
And, what happened to my present?
Which present?
What I asked for: the English girl?!
Oh, that! Well, I did what I could, now we have to wait a few months to see if its a girl !!!